Today was Mark’s birthday. This is not where I thought I’d be at 32, Mark told me. Last year, he declared that he had everything he had ever wanted in life: a son, a wife, a house and a career he always dreamed of. Life felt complete and yet one year later, only remnants of our previous life exist. You will experience that happiness again, I assured him. I have to believe that the best has yet to be.
As Mark held Theo in his arms and blew out his birthday candles, I knew what he was wishing for – it’s the same wish I pray for each night. I also wished that my strong and loving husband celebrates his 33rd birthday feeling the happiness he deserves.
When we were discharged from the hospital two weeks ago, we sat down with Theo’s palliative team and discussed what life would be like for our chronically ill son. The predicable scenarios, which would result in us having to say goodbye to our son, were presented with only the timeline being unpredictable. From that point on, Mark and I vowed to recognize the importance of each occasion we are lucky enough to celebrate with Theo.
Today was Mark’s birthday, and today we celebrated another special occasion with Theo. This is not where he thought he would be at 32 but when he bent down and kissed our son’s forehead after he blew out his candles, part of me was thankful that this is exactly where we are.
Today’s miracle is Theo in his father’s arms, blowing out candles and making birthday wishes.